As Time Goes By

I went back to my hometown last few days. The four of us, myself, my Mama, Abah and my aunt cleaned up my grandparents' house since it is about time to let go of old stuffs, plus my grandparents are no longer here, in this world with us. It has been more than 20 years since they've passed away. Furthermore, the house will be under construction for the whole month of ramadhan, and I doubt that it will be settled by Aidilfitri. So, we need to clean all the old stuffs like old documents, old clothes, old furniture, old utensils etc. To make it short, everything that's old and can't be used anymore.

Surprisingly, I found old stuffs that touched my heart very much. I found old letters written by my Mama, Abah, aunts and uncles for my grandparents. My Grandpa (Wan) will keep all the letters in one file which he named it "Letters from children". He kept all the letters according to its chronological order. He even copied his letters to his children. Mama even cried a little when she read the letter that she wrote to her father. I know that she misses her parents a lot.

Not only that, I also found old photos. It's true that photographs are like a frozen in time. All that I can see are smiles and laughs. Maybe, I can't really sense the sadness because I've never stayed in the house for more than a week, I've never met my grandparents, not like my other sisters. However, I can feel the loss, and I can reflect it to myself.

I can never be ready to face any loss in my life. It's sad to say goodbye to the ones that we love. I even feel homesick whenever I'm in my hostel, even when I can call my parents and family members whenever I want. 

I even visited my mum's aunt and uncle. They're in their seventies now. We're quite close among most of our relatives. It's sad to see people getting older. Tok Nah's voice doesn't came out for the pass few months already. She has a small complication on her throat, I don't really know the specific cause for that. Allahu, she can only whisper when she wants to speak. But, I can still remember her voice. She used to speak with a loud tone. Orang utara kata riuh la...Tok Din is still with his jokes, but he looks tired not like when I last saw him. 

Then, we met Aunty Aiza, she's the daughter of my grandparents' best friends, Wan Nordin and Tok No'in (that's what I called them). "Kita sambung persahabatan dan persaudaraan mak bapak kita na...", she told my mum and my aunt. Wan Nordin passed away when I was 17, and Tok No'in passed away last year. Both of them are like my own grandparents.

As Time Goes By,
Tak ada apa yang kekal selamanya.
Aku juga bakal seperti mereka.
Waktunya tak tahu bila.
Kerana dunia ini sementara.